Halloween Muffin Massacre

December 19th, 2008


Muffins (Otis, 1-4, 17, Young Muffin Leader, Young Muffin 1-3)
The Muffin Man

Scene 1

Narrator: It is All Hallow's Eve. All the children in the town of Niffum-Nap are preparing for the night's festivities; waiting as their mother's place the finishing touches on their costumes, making sure they have their candy bucket or bag, meeting up with friends to go trick-or-treating in groups. Everything about the town is busy with excitement. Meanwhile, there is a disturbance at the town dump. For many years this has been the resting place of the town's discarded muffins, but now they intend to change that. They are banding together to form the greatest muffin militia that has never been seen! Their leader, Otis, is overseeing this gathering of the deceased pastries...
[exit narrator, enter Otis & other muffins]
Otis: Ok, so. You there, fetch me some coffee. You, see if you can salvage any utensils suitable for combat. And you [to Muffin 17] see to it that the freshest are brought to me for inspection immediately.
Muffin 17: Yes, sir. I'll be back in a flash. [exit Muffin 17]
Otis: Ok everybody, listen up. This is important. Hey, I SAID LISTEN UP! That's more like it. Ok, so you all know why we have gathered here tonight?
All: Yes, sir!
Otis: Tell me.
Otis: [laughs] Yes, revenge. Revenge against those that wished to see us rot here, in an eternal limbo between edible and stale. But tonight, we shall prove them wrong. Tonight, they shall remember, and regret that they ever tried to rid themselves of our muffiny goodness!
[cheering; enter Muffin 17]
Otis: Well? Where are the fresh recruits?
Muffin 17: [nervously] Sir, there appears to be a problem.
Otis: And what is this problem?
Muffin 17: Well, they're gone. I went to the barracks and they were empty. Sir, I think they went on without us.